neverhappened: 645 / br - small 2 bedroom to share

645 / br - small 2 bedroom to share

Reply to: [email protected]
Date: Tue Feb 01 07:08:00 2005

Hello,

I am looking to share my small 2 bedroom apartment in the east village. I've gone through several roomates in the past 6 months so I have to be upfront about my living situation. There are several guidelines to living in this apartment. I guess I'm a bit quirky which I never realized until living with people outside my family. IF you think you can live with this arrangement then please contact me. I am givng you a good deal finacially as the apartment actually costs $2000 a month but I am charging you only $645.

1) I have a cat so if you are allergic please don't inquire. He is a very nice cat named General Tso.

2) I keep the floors extremely clean, so clean that you can eat off of them, which is actually what I do. I have a thing about plates and utensils. I eat 2 well cooked fried eggs off of a small tile in the middle of the living room with chopsticks every evening at 7:15 PM. You cannot touch my chopsticks.

3) My mother stops by twice a week and yells at me for an hour or so and sobs about her only son being gay. I'm actually not gay I just don't date a lot. She doesn't get this. She is harmless though but may pinch your cheeks when she see's you.

7) I sometimes come home reeking of fish. Please don't ask me about this.

5) I hum a lot, sometimes for hours. It's not usually loud but if I am in the living room brushing General Tso and I'm humming, it may get to you and you would have to go into your room.

6) I have a sequencing disorder which means I get numbers mixed up and sometimes words. I will on occasion type a sentence into my computer and run a special grammer and spelling check on it before actually speaking to you. This takes time and can try one's patience.

8) I like to talk sometimes. At other times I will ask you to not speak to me for days at a time. Please stop talking to me when I ask you this.

9) Everything in the fridge is labeled. There are various names on all of the food but be assured they all belong to me. You can have one shelf in the fridge but no more. I will ask you to label all of your food "Mortimer". I will never eat Mortimer's food.

That is all. I wanted to make a list of 10 things but I think I fell one short, oh well. Some people say I'm difficult to live with. I don't have a criminal record and have never raised my voice except when the General tries to eat my eggs. I will not stand by your bed at night wearing a chicken costume. I also will not put hot sauce into your toothpaste tube while you sleep. I promise.

I need the first month's rent upfront. Please send me some information about yourself if you think you can live with me.

name:

age:

sexual identification:

age:

favorite kitchen utensil/appliance:

email:

2 good qualities about yourself:

1 bad quality about yourself:

Thank you.

Thurber Milford Finkelstein

Comments

You got a really useful blog I have been here reading for about half an hour. I am a newbie and your post is valuable for me. these practices are unfair; but they say that most of their rules are only to apply to people who overdra.

Posted by: Creative Recreation | August 17, 2010 at 03:27 PM